This Thanksgiving doesn’t look like I expected.

I’m not sitting around the table with my wife and kids today. They’re with her parents, and I’m in Nashville picking up my seven-year-old nephew, Finley, so he can spend a few days with his dad.

It’s not wrong to say it out loud: this isn’t ideal. It’s heavy. It’s different. It’s not the Thanksgiving any of us would have planned.

I keep telling myself, this is just a season. And I believe that’s true. Seasons change. Circumstances shift. This won’t always look like this.

But I’m also learning that I don’t want to rush through this season so fast that I miss the moments God has given us inside of it. Even in the hard season…especially in the hard season…I want to be present. I want to be grateful for every moment we still have. I want to enjoy the time we’ve been given, not just endure it.

If I’m honest, it would be easy to slip into a pity party. Easy to focus on what’s missing. Easy to grieve what life used to look like and what we wish it still was. But this season has been teaching me something important about gratitude.

One of the most meaningful statements I’ve heard about thankfulness is this: we don’t give thanks because life is perfect; we give thanks because God is faithful.

That has been so true for our family…especially with my brother.

If anyone has permission to be bitter, cynical, or angry, it’s him. ALS has taken so much from him. And yet, through all of it, he continues to find the good. He notices small blessings. He expresses gratitude. He chooses joy where it would be easier to choose despair.

He’s such an inspiration to so many.

Gratitude doesn’t pretend everything is fine when it isn’t. Gratitude simply acknowledges that even in the hardest chapters, God has not stopped being good…and He has not stopped being present.

This Thanksgiving, I’m thankful for family, even when it’s complicated.I’m thankful for time together, even when it comes through sacrifice.

I’m thankful for this season…even though it’s hard…because it reminds me not to take a single moment for granted. And I’m thankful for a faithful God, even when life feels fragile and uncertain.

I’m learning that gratitude isn’t something we wait to feel after things get better. It’s something we choose because God is still faithful…right here, right now.

Lessons Learned:Embracing Change

In October I celebrated 30 years of being on staff at Stevens Creek Church. So needless to say I have learned a lot of lessons over the years. The importance of embracing change was one of them. I was incredibly fortunate to start my ministry journey under a lead pastor who was ahead of his time. Long before it was trendy, he was committed to creating a relevant, outward-focused church. Some pastors collect old sermon notes—he collected bold ideas. He understood that the church shouldn’t be stuck in the past but should continually evolve to reach people effectively.

A Culture of Change

From day one, I was thrown into the deep end of church leadership. My first weekend on staff, we attended a John Maxwell leadership conference, and my brain nearly exploded (in a good way). Shortly after, we traveled to Willow Creek Church in Chicago for leadership and arts conferences, and I had another mind-blown moment. These experiences changed the way I thought about church. It taught me that change can be good and being creative and trying new things can fuel growth.

Over the years we have constantly changed things from music style to service times. At one point we changed service times ten times in just two years. TEN. If you’ve ever tried telling church people that their service time is changing, you know it’s basically the spiritual equivalent of moving College football games to Wednesday morning. We survived, though, and what I learned was priceless: The more you implement change the more it becomes the culture of your church or business.

The Evolution of Worship (Or, How Many Times Can We Rearrange the Stage?)

If you had walked into our church over the years, you might have thought you were visiting a different place each time. Worship styles evolved, stage set ups changed, leadership approaches shifted, and creative elements came and went.

We had drama sketches for a period of time.
We went from a full choir to small ensembles to two singers on stage, then back again.
One season, worship was acoustic-driven; the next, it was a full-on electric guitar then another that was synth heavy.
I even learned to play acoustic guitar …. because apparently, that’s what all the "cool" worship leaders were doing.

Through all of this, one thing never changed: our mission—to create an experience where lost people can be found, and found people can grow in their faith.

Lessons for Church Leaders

If there’s one thing I’ve learned, it’s that change is not the enemy—stagnation is. Churches that refuse to evolve risk becoming museums instead of movements. If you’re not moving…you’re dying. Here are a few leadership takeaways:

Lead with Vision – Change is easier when people understand the "why" behind it. Keep your mission clear and compelling (and maybe throw in some coffee incentives).
Stay Flexible – If the early church met in homes and we’re still fighting over pews vs. chairs, we might be missing the point.
Invest in Growth – Attend conferences, learn from innovative leaders, and expose yourself to fresh ideas. If you’re the smartest person in every room, you need a new room.
Empower Your Team – A culture of change isn’t created by one person. Build a team willing to dream, experiment, and pivot together.
Keep the Main Thing the Main Thing – Styles, formats, and methods will shift, but the mission of growing people into fully devoted followers of Christ must remain at the center.

Moving Forward (Or, What’s Next? Because It’s Probably Changing Again)

As church leaders, our responsibility isn’t to preserve what has been but to boldly step into what could be. The world is changing, and we must be willing to meet people where they are—whether that means adjusting service times, switching up the music, or simply learning how to use Instagram without looking like someone’s confused uncle.

So, what changes are you facing in your church today? Are you resisting them, or are you leading the way forward?